Some Handy Examples of How Non-Sex Working Feminists Can Aid in Critiquing the Sex Industry

  • Your women's studies prof: Class, do you think pornography enables male entitlement?
  • You: Well, according to this essay I read by someone who does porn, it doesn't make a lot of sense to just critique it as a piece of media + not a site + product of highly stigmatized labor. So, yes, it does, but that may largely be beside the point of where and how male violence occurs in relation to pornography.
  • That lady at your local NOW chapter: It is WRONG for men to purchase sex, therefore we must make it illegal.
  • You: I agree that capitalist conditions create coercive and abusive situations for those in the sex industry, but carceral solutions don't address that underlying issue.
  • Your younger sister: *points at a Maxim magazine cover* Isn't it wrong that there are all these sexualized pictures of women everywhere?
  • You: It's wrong that the male gaze is all-pervasive and our idea of the ideal woman is profoundly racist, sizeist, ableist, and cissexist. It's also wrong that these images exist within the context of a violent patriarchal culture, but the images themselves are not wrong.
  • Some rando in your ask box: How do we end the abuse of people in the sex industries?
  • You: Let me link you to this blog by sex workers advocating for workers' rights.
  • Your boyfriend: Why is there so much bad sex in porn?
  • You: Let me show you this essay on porn by a sex worker.
  • Your girlfriend: Stripping is exploitative.
  • You: Let me show you this academic article written by a stripper.
  • Your aunt: Dominatrices probably think they're empowered but really--
  • You: Here's a thing written by a sex worker.
  • Your grandpa: Prostitution--
  • You: Here's a thing written by a sex worker.
  • Your cat:
  • You: Good point, let me read you this issue of Prose & Lore out loud.
  • You: *signal boosts our words + shows up at rallies + emails legislators + gives orgs like Abeni + Sex Workers Project all your damn money*

Anonymous said: Dearest Lori, after reading posts on your blog & educating myself w/ resources you've linked, I've learned lots! I know you advocate for decriminalization as an interim measure (please correct me if I'm wrong). How do you recommend that feminists like myself support sex workers while simultaneously advocating against the sex industry? I know capitalism is the problem, but shouldn't we still hold male buyers accountable? (p.s. I rewrote this b/c the faux-formality made me sound like a fedora MRA)


Hey, I hate to break it to you, dearest, but you are the equal + opposite force of the MRA: the feminist who really really wants to talk about the men + what we can do about those men. I’m tired of talking about men. But okay, what are we holding them accountable for? Participating in patriarchy? Then why limit yourself to just those who purchase sexual services? Participating in capitalism? Why are we limiting it to men? Why don’t you give nearly as many fucks about the way you, me, AND all these men buy clothes produced by mostly-female garment workers laboring under horrible conditions for low pay? Who asked you to advocate against the sex industry in particular, one of the very few industries that remains an option for those who have been pushed out of all the formal economies like the abusive garment industry? The sex industry is going to be among the *last* to fall, because the poor, disabled, and generally disregarded are going to keep needing it till the revolution ends and utopia is cobbled together from the wreckage of the Forever 21s and H&Ms.

Sex workers don’t need *you* to critique the sex industry. We need you to support *us* in our critiques. If you’re looking for something to advocate against in your free time and economic justice just isn’t sexy enough for you, why not try domestic violence, since that pushes a huge number of people— including most of the underage youth— into the industry? Or, hell, volunteer to play with the kittens at your local animal shelter. Just please, do not write another second-semester philosophy essay on pornography’s effects on male viewers.

Lori Adorable was on a roll last night with her responses to busybody non sexworker feminists looking to dismantle patriarchy by focusing only on sex workers.


(via bbbeecky)

"If for some reason, the idea of your dancing being connected to the strip club scene is upsetting to you, if you desperately need to distance what you do from what those ‘other girls’ do, if you truly believe that you are doing this because it’s just a really good workout, then I strongly suggest you spend some time thinking about why you chose pole dancing. Because there are a million ways to get fit without putting on six inch stilettos, a bikini and swinging sensually around a pole."

 Quote from The Pole Story.

what I think is funny is that the specific girl got me all het up is arguing that actually pole dance originated as Mallakhamb or Chinese acrobatics, a stance apparently being promoted by non-stripper pole dancers trying to get social acceptance by affiliating with a grand tradition of like, western appropriation.

but like, the resurgence of pole work in pop culture and it’s subsequent popularity has little to do with men doing acrobatics on large wooden poles or rubber coated poles; it has EVERYTHING to do with western culture’s obsession with female bodies and commodified sexuality and more specifically and recently, strippers.  

The tricks she’s doing so badly in her pictures?  Those are stripper moves.  Strippers created performing on a brass pole, strippers popularised it, strippers TEACH IT. 

and strippers get thrown under the bus now it’s been picked up, washed off, and made cool for middle class women looking for empowerment. 

(via missfreudianslit)

so agree - there are so many ways to get fit - if it is a pole dancing class, it’s a use of strippers’ labour

(Source: clarawebbwillcutoffyourhead, via missfreudianslit)


Day 1 Feminist Porn Conference

Yesterday I attended the following panels:

More Buck for Your Bang - Affiliate 101 info with Jiz Lee

Getting In and Getting Out - Identity progression as you enter, are in and leave the porn industry with Dylan Ryan and Danny Wylde

Evaluating the Outcome - How Do We Know When Porn Was Produced With Ethical Feminist Principles? With Jessica Drake, Danny Wylde, Shine Louise Houston, Tristan Taormino and Carlyle Jansen

I will write some overs actions and reflections at my official website once I get back home.
Adult only content
Yeah, it’s a porn site.


Oh my gosh. I love this one. @

(Source: fuckyeahcraft, via bbbeecky)


I will always love this song - Candy’s Room. Captures (I think) what it is like to be a sweet boy falling for a sex worker. Cannot put a price on it. But a gal has to pay the bills.

PS I hope when I am in my 60s I rock (in my own way) just as hard.

In Candy’s room there are pictures of her heroes on the wall
but to get to Candy’s room you gotta walk the darkness of Candy’s hall
Strangers from the city call my baby’s number and they bring her toys
When I come knocking she smiles pretty she knows I wanna be Candy’s boy
There’s a sadness hidden in that pretty face
A sadness all her own from which no man can keep Candy safe

We kiss, my heart’s rushes to my brain
The blood rushes in my veins fire rushes towards the sky
We go driving driving deep into the night
I go driving deep into the light in Candy’s eyes

She says baby if you wanna be wild
you got a lot to learn, close your eyes
Let them melt, let them fire, let them burn
Cause in the darkness there’ll be hidden worlds that shine
When I hold Candy close she makes these hidden worlds mine

She has fancy clothes and diamond rings
She has men who give her anything she wants but they don’t see
That what she wants is me,
oh and I want her so
I’ll never let her go, no no no
She knows that I’d give
all that I got to give
All that I want all that I live
to make Candy mine


An influence for my burlesque work. 

My gym bag: Aasics t2l7n size 8 shoes, Fresh Mint Tic Tacs, Daisy Warez Signature Collection Perfume, 10 year old Nike gloves, MAC Face Protect 50 SPF, black hair bandeau from AA, l’Occitane shea butter lip balm, Granier BB cream (new a clean alternative!), soap case with Lush shampoo bar and black face soap, Ojin dry shampoo. Need to switch key lock with combo lock.

My gym bag: Aasics t2l7n size 8 shoes, Fresh Mint Tic Tacs, Daisy Warez Signature Collection Perfume, 10 year old Nike gloves, MAC Face Protect 50 SPF, black hair bandeau from AA, l’Occitane shea butter lip balm, Granier BB cream (new a clean alternative!), soap case with Lush shampoo bar and black face soap, Ojin dry shampoo. Need to switch key lock with combo lock.